#OldTestamentTrump
"These mitzvoth are going to be huge. There is nothing like them. I guarantee that. And of course, I wrote them myself."
On the economy
On Tuesday Trump said he would implement something “much, much better” than The Year of Jubilee.
In Wednesday's speech, Trump discounted the “negative impact of Asherim, high places & shires to Dagon” in the kingdom.
Questioned about ignoring Torah on the Temple Tax, alms, field gleaning & observing Jubilee Trump said, “That makes me smart.”
Newly unearthed papyri substantiates that Trump supported the Babylonian siege of Jerusalem saying, “that’s called business.”
On National Security
“The Canaanites are bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists. And some, I assume, are good people.”
Regarding the Egyptian massacre of Hebrew infants “that would have played out differently w/ spears flying the other direction.”
“The fact is that we need unpredictability,” Trump said of his openness to using bronze weapons.
On Foreign Policy
“Babylon, Babylon, Babylon, Babylon, Babylon, Babylon, Babylon, Babylon, China!”
“I will build a great wall on our southern border and I will make the Philistines pay for that wall. Mark my words.”
On dealing with the Ephraimites Trump said “we should go for shibboleth & we should go tougher than shibboleth”
On Race Relations in the Country
"Actually they're racially profiling. Not us. Why do they bring this up?" Egyptian Trump said. "These people are sick."
On Goliath's action against the Children of Israel: "He was a really bad guy but you know what he did well? He killed terrorists. He did that so good."
Asked if he will disavow Pharaoh & Nile Delta supremacist groups supporting him, Trump said, "I don't know anything about Pharaoh, OK?"
“Raise your hand if you’re not an Aaronide Levite. There’s a couple: should we keep them in the room?”
On Education
“We cannot have the bureaucrats in the Tabernacle telling you how to manage your child's education.”
“One of the key problems today is that worship is such a disgrace, good people don't go into the Tabernacle.”
On school reform: "We can't get a fu_king school built in Beersheba!"
On school safety: "You know what a sword and spear--free zone is for a sicko? That's bait"
On Climate Change
“Sun shining in Dan & Beersheba, record setting harvest throughout the country. The Day of The LORD is an expensive hoax!”
Other Statements of Note
Speaking to King Solomon: "My IQ is one of the highest. Please don't feel so stupid or insecure; it's not your fault."
On the Egyptian plagues: “You could see there was blood coming out of their eyes, blood coming out of their whatever.”
“I want to protect all of the Torah: Exodus, Leviticus, Deuteronomy, Bartholomy, go down the list.”
"I could stand in the middle of the Temple Court and stab somebody and wouldn't lose my minyan ok? It's like incredible."
"We will repeal and replace the disastrous YHWH-care of Leviticus.”
"I always wanted to carry a warm sack of Philistine foreskins. This was much easier.”