As with a number of our Canon Cards, the version of the Bible you're reading might cause or solve your confusion (or offense) at our wording. In this case, some of you are asking, “where the hell are the male prostitutes in the Bible?!” Which, let’s admit, is a question you shouldn’t be screaming out loud in a church.

The King James Version of this passage reads

Thou shalt not bring the hire of a whore, or the price of a dog, into the house of the LORD thy God for any vow: for even both these are abomination unto the LORD thy God.

And before you jump all over our beloved ye olde KJV as being weird and out of touch, both the New American Standard Version and English Standard Version (among others) retain the "whore" and "dog" duo in their translations.

Let’s first address the translation we did NOT go with and the havoc that it has wrought.

The "Whore" and "Dog"  Translations

Some who have read "whore" and "dog" translations are concerned that this verse is banning the sale of dogs, or at least bringing money that was gained in the selling of dogs, into a church (No, we did not just make that up. That's a thing people worry about, in real life, after reading this passage. Come Lord Jesus). They imagine Jesus forming a new braided whip, running into their worship service, and setting free the puppy mill run in the back of their church.

[Note: if you have a puppy mill in your church, you're going to Hell. If you have a puppy mill anywhere, you're going to Hell. Puppy mills are bad. We're mostly cat people, and even we think puppy mills are bad. Don't support puppy mills.]

Others take a more sane approach to the verse: if you sold your dog Rex’s puppy to Tammy-Jo-Lynn down the street, and you wanted to tithe to your church’s building fund from the payment you received, DON’T. You are risking hell fire and eternal damnation! Or at least that is how they read the "whore" and "dog" translations. And how else could one read it?

Honestly, if we knew that there were people living with this confusion of the verse, this card might have gone in a completely different direction. However, we went with the translation that honors the Hebrew.

"Male Prostitutes" are not "Dogs," Sort of . . .

While the word used in this passage is kelev כֶּלֶב, which does generally translate as “dog” (See Exodus 11:7 & Judges 7:5), in the context of this passage it is a widely understood as a euphemism for male prostitutes. Thus, it stands in parallel to the mention of female prostitutes ("whores") earlier in the verse. This is made more clear by the preceding verse:

None of the daughters of Israel shall be a temple prostitute; none of the sons of Israel shall be a temple prostitute. (vs 17)

Verse 17 and 18 are employing a type of parallel structure seen throughout the Hebrew Bible, most obviously noticed throughout the Psalms. 

Male prostitutes are being referred to as "dogs": there are not actual canines romping through the Temple. 

It is of important note that these verses are within the larger context of Deuteronomy 23, a chapter concerned about human purity before the LORD. And as we have written about before, this includes instructions in case of wet dreams (vs 10), and the use of special shit digging tools on the battle field (vs 12-13). 

What Now?

While the question of defining "dogs" might be settled for some, we were left wondering about the practical applications of this verse for today. Not that we advocate the selling of puppies or people within church walls (regardless of how much you could make for that new drum set or Rhodes organ), but perhaps there is a lesson to learn from both the clarified passage and the confusion. 

Perhaps we should all ask if the "holiness" of our church (local and universal) is so great that it would bar prostitutes of all genders (or none at all) within its doors? Not to sell themselves, but to see what our faith, our community, our God has to offer.

If someone entered the sanctuary looking as if they had just worked a long 22-hours in the parts of town "good christians" pretend do not exist, how would that person be greeted? Like someone made in the image of God? Or like an unwanted stray dog? 

Perhaps the honest answer would surprise you.

Perhaps it wouldn't.

But what do we know? We made this game and you probably think we're going to Hell.